37:09!

5K.. take two!

This time, I finished in 37:09 and ran the entire time! The route was about 3.25 miles, so my total time was 39 minutes.

Since this was a fun run/walk, they sent the runners off first. I couldn't believe how most of them just took off at full speed. I was a little embarrassed that I started off so slow, but I knew it would kill me if I started out at a fast pace like that. In the end, I actually ended up passing them up. Slow and steady wins the race. :)

Next up is the Turkey Trot in November. I'm not sure what the route is, but I'm really hoping that it avoids the hills... in Hillsboro. The route in Nokomis was nice and flat.

In other news, my new running shoes are still not in! Boo.

Can I call myself a runner yet?

I'm not sure if I can classify myself as a runner just yet.

Though, I did get professionally fit for running shoes last week. They are pretty sweet. However, I still have monster wide feet, so they had to order them in a wide. I'm looking forward to breaking them in.

My next 5K is October 12th. I can honestly say that I'm looking forward to it! I'm not sure that I will be able to run the entire thing, but we will see. I've only worked up to running just over 2 miles. I'm a little worried that I will finish last, though. I know it doesn't matter - it's a "fun run" but I do not want to be that person that the police car has to follow all the way to the finish... And this race will be much smaller than the Color Run, so my chances of being the slowest runner are high.

My fastest mile is now 11:30! I pushed myself really hard on Sunday night and got to that time. I was thrilled. I'm running an average of about a 12 minute mile. Right now, I'm walking 5 minutes as a warmup, running 25 minutes, and then a 5 minute cool down. It's about 2.75 miles total. I really want to walk less than that for the 5K.

Of course, the scale has not moved one pound. But I'm learning to trust more of what I feel in my clothes and what other people see. I can't trust me own perception of what I look like because it is so distorted still. I have to be losing inches because I am still going down pants and shirt sizes. So, the total weight lost is still 92 pounds. But, I have to learn to appreciate how far I have come. I was going through clothes to consign tonight, and I have pants from a year ago that are size 24. I am now a 16! I can't begin to tell you how awesome that feels. One year ago, I guarantee I could not have run more than 20 seconds. I can now run for 25 minutes!

I'm 28 and the healthiest I have ever been. So thankful.

Running is a term I use very loosely.

Yesterday, I ran my very first 5K! And by ran, I mean I very slowly jogged for most of it. I think I ended up walking about 8 minutes of it. My time was 43:29. I'm pretty happy with that. But, I did it on 5 hours of sleep. I know that if I had gotten a decent amount of sleep that I would have been able to run more. The first mile or so was a steady uphill climb that nearly killed me. So, lesson learned: Don't try to go to your 10 year high school reunion 2 hours away the night before you run!

Speaking of, I had a blast catching up with classmates. It's fun to see how we've all grown and changed since high school. It's also fun to see how some things never change.

I have plans for another 5K on October 12th. I really want to see if I can run the whole thing. However, I am going to take at least 5 days off from running for some recovery time. My hips are sore today, but it isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

I'm still picking color out of my nails and have remnants on my toes.

Before... and yes, we wore tutus.

And after!

A new picture!

8 pounds to go!

2 more pounds off! Took a few weeks, but the scale seems to be moving again. I cannot wait to see 218 on the scale. That will be my official 100 pounds lost mark! Funny thing is... I haven't run for a week because it has been so horribly hot, and I didn't eat particularly well this weekend. And I lost a pound.. ? Explain that one. I'll never understand it. Back to running tonight!

My loose skin is really bothering me. People say that they can't see it or don't notice it, but it's making me crazy. The only skin that people can really see is my arms. I'm constantly self conscious about them.

School is kicking my rear. I was so tired last week from the heat, the new schedule, and just general stress from the start of the year. I'm hoping this week will be a little easier. I'm encouraged by the sounds that my choirs are making! My junior high choir is confident and they are a fantastic bunch of musicians. We start on Christmas music this week! My high school choir is beginning work on our Variety Show music. We have a lot of new faces in the high school group this year, so we are rebuilding a bit, but I am so glad to see new people in my group! Thursday is the big musical announcement! I hope the kids are as excited about it as I am. 

The dating front remains unchanged. I date here and there and nothing ever comes out of it. I'm really tired of it. Can't I just meet "the one" already?

Back to school.. back to school...

It's so hard to believe that the summer is nearly over. I can't believe how fast it has gone, yet it feels like I got to do so much. It has been the best summer ever, made even better by the fact that I did not have to move for the FIRST TIME IN 10 YEARS!

Instead, my big physical labor project is working on my yard. Dad is coming down next week to trim all of my trees and bushes way back. We are also doing some other work around the house while he's here. My brother is going to be here in September to rip out all of the huge, ugly bushes that surround my house. I'm so excited to get rid of those disgusting things.

Running has also been on the agenda. I took a few weeks off in July when it was ridiculously hot, and got back into it a few weeks ago. I have been faithfully running every other day for almost three weeks now and have not seen any movement in my weight. I feel like I'm killing myself running (and I don't particularly enjoy it!) and not seeing any results. My food is far from perfect, but I don't feel like I'm making horrible choices. I'm thinking about going back to some protein shakes and see if that might jumpstart my weight loss again. I really, really wanted to be at 100 pounds lost before the start of school. 90 will have to do I think.

So, I believe I have lost about 10 pounds this summer. *rolls eyes* That sounds so lame. I have lost one pants size, as well. I guess that's something. I feel like it's going to take 10 years to get off this 50 pounds!

I am looking forward to seeing my kiddos again and get the year started. I feel like I have picked some great music (plus a fantastic musical!) and I can't wait to dig in! Here goes my third year!

Affairs and guilt

We have a love affair with food. I do, at least. I've never met anyone who doesn't genuinely enjoy good food. 

My love affair with food has been changed. I still enjoy good food, don't get me wrong. I enjoy it in much smaller portions and I enjoy healthier options. I mourned my loss of food for a very long time. It would be sad to me that I couldn't eat 2 plates full of food. I think the grieving time is over. I am learning to satisfy my mind with less food. 

Is it weird that it still bothers me to waste food? We ate at the buffet at our resort often and I rarely finished a plate. I tried to get as little as possible so I wouldn't waste, but sometimes I wanted tastes of many different things. I held such guilt while I was there. I know there were people just miles from me who are hungry and here I am; throwing away food. It just messes with me. But I have to keep telling myself- just because they are hungry doesn't mean you have to eat their portion too. I still remember my grandma making me finish my happy meal when I was little because she grew up so poor and went hungry often. 

I have made sacrifices and sometimes people are surprised at some of the things I have to do that comes as a result of this surgery. Just to name a few...

No more ibuprofen or aspirin for the rest of my life. 

Eliminating foods with added sugar. (And if I do make a poor decision, I pay for it!)

Never eating and drinking at the same time. (It hurts!!)

Plastic surgery for loose skin. 

I would do it all over again!! Obesity is like a prison. It's a vicious cycle that is so hard to get out of. The freedom I feel is amazing. I know that I could not have done this without the surgery as a tool. Because of the surgery, I was able to get weight off and be motivated by the results. I am able to exercise now without my joints rebelling. I now have the tools to keep going with my weight loss and live a healthy life. How lucky am I to have a second chance at life?

My 28th birthday will mark one year since I began my journey. I think that calls for a party!

Caribbean fun!

I've been in the Dominican Republic for the past week and have had an absolute blast! We have been on the beach, at the pool, partying, and relaxing. 

The Dominican men love curvy American blondes, so the attention from them hasn't been surprising. But, attention from other men has been surprising! It is an adjustment, that's for sure. 

Watching what I eat has been a struggle here, especially with the alcohol. I wouldn't be surprised if a few pounds snuck on this week. But, it's back to work running and eating right when I get back home. 

Tomorrow we are getting pedicures and soaking up our last day in the Caribbean. We fly out on Wednesday back to Richmond. Then I fly back to Indy on Friday. 

Here's a picture of my new swimsuit body! (Let's be honest, I'm FAR from a swimsuit body, but I certainly look better!)

1 week!!

Oh my goodness, I can't sleep because I am so excited about my vacation! 

I just got back to Hillsboro today from my moms. I played flute with the Urbana Pops Orchestra on their concert last night. I will be honest, I am pretty rusty as far as flute playing is concerned. I haven't done any hard core playing since my Millikin days 6 years ago. It took some serious work to get myself back in shape. By the concert, I finally felt like a competent flutist again. I really need to play more; I love it and I have an incredible instrument that does a lot of sitting in the case. 

I also managed to lose another pound while I was in Villa Grove. Woo!! I did my second day of C25K while I was there. I have yet to do my third day. I had some sort of bronchitis or something going on. Anyway, I've been hacking up a lung for multiple days. I would like to be able to breathe again before I do day 3 of C25K. We'll see how I feel tomorrow. 

I went to visit my dad today before I left. Even though our relationship has been pretty hit and miss, he has always been very supportive of my surgery. He always asks me how much weight I've lost and has a huge smile when I tell him the number. Support is everything to me- it keeps me going. There are days where I just really need encouragement, and I never have to look far. 

I will be getting blood tests done soon to check cholesterol, triglycerides, etc. After years of dreading those numbers, I'm actually excited to find out what they are. My blood pressure has never been high, but always on the higher end of normal. It did drop at my last appointment. Yahoo! My BMI is also down 10 points. My doctor's goal weight for me is still considered "overweight" according to the BMI chart, but I think that anything less is pretty unrealistic for my build. 

Sticking to no sugar! I didn't have any stupid mistakes this week. I am really happy that I've been able to stick with that- for the most part. I think it has made the biggest difference in my life and I can attribute my continued weight loss to it. 

Hopefully the next update will be from the sunny beaches of the Dominican Republic! I might even get really brave and post a swimsuit picture!

Skinny jeans!

Feeling good in skinny jeans for the first time ever!

I have had some struggles in the last few days. I'm going to be 6 months out soon and it's getting tougher because my portions are larger. It's up to me to use this as a tool. I try to keep myself motivated with pictures and what not. If how I feel and look after an 80 pound weight loss isn't enough motivation for me, then I don't know what is. 

The good thing is that my body will not tolerate large amounts of added sugar! I ate a cupcake on Tuesday (yes, hi, my name is Amy, and I'm stupid) and I spent all day Wednesday paying for that poor decision. I'm actually quite relieved because that is great motivation to NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!

I am officially starting the c25k app tomorrow night! Exercise will definitely help me meet my weight loss goals. It will be a necessity as my food portions get larger. 

I know I will have tough times and setbacks in this journey. I'm not so naive to think that it will all be puppies and rainbows the whole time. But I also know that a setback does not have to ruin the entire journey. 

Back on track! 

Most recent picture

Here's a more recent picture. This is with one of my choir seniors. 

Two days until freedom!

Tomorrow, we have kids until noon and then Wednesday is our institute. Freedom! Of course, Thursday is the Six Flags trip, but that's mostly fun. 

I hit 81 pounds lost this morning! I definitely did a happy dance. I feel so wonderful. I have 7 more pounds to lose to hit my goal before vacation. I've got three weeks. I think I can do it. Every single pound is a victory. I can't believe I'm so fortunate to have this second chance at an active, healthy, and fulfilling life. I know now that I can accomplish anything. Bring on the 5K training! I ran all the way from my house to a friend's tonight. I'm sure it was no farther than 1/8 of a mile, but that's still an accomplishment for me!

I can now see the 100 pound mark ahead of me.. I am so excited to get there. I would really like to be there by the end of summer. 

Naturally, I have some issues with loose skin now. I knew that I would, but it's still unpleasant. My arms are really showing if right now. My stomach, inner thighs, and butt aren't far behind. Plastic surgery will happen eventually. But, I figure it would be more intelligent to wait until after I'm done stretching out my stomach from having kids before I get any tucks done. Or maybe I could do the non-stomach tucks first. I don't know. I do have plastic surgery connections (don't ask me how!), and he's ready for me whenever I'm ready. First, I have 57 more pounds to lose!

Next week, I'll be playing with the Urbana Pops Orchestra. I'm so excited to play my flute again! I really miss it. Maggie isn't too thrilled about the flute thing because it means that the attention is not focused on her...

Summer... almost!

I suppose I'm overdue for an update. I'm not even sure that people read this, but it's nice to put my thoughts out there.

Since the musical ended, it has been a constant rush at school to get spring concert music learned, wrap up music appreciation classes, and get about 120 students auditioned for next year's ensembles. The junior high concert was last Monday. It went well! I'm really excited about next year's junior high choir. The ensemble is looking very strong. I can't wait to start working with them. (But first, I need a 2.5 month break.)

The high school concert is on Sunday. We had a month to learn our music since we didn't do much choir rehearsal during the musical. Beauty and the Beast was just so much more difficult that I had to take a lot of choir time to rehearse. And I picked very difficult music for the high school choir this semester. Our biggest challenge is a Gerald Finzi piece that is typically sung by college ensembles. I am so proud of them for working their butts off on it and getting it learned for the concert.

On Sunday I will be 5 months out from surgery. I am currently 78 pounds down total and 70 post-op. I've been on a stall for about 2 weeks now, but that's normal.

I am loving my new life. I love the energy I have and I love my new body. I still have 60 pounds left to lose (which seems really daunting right now...), but I'm just trying to enjoy my body currently.

The natural stretching of my stomach is freaking me out. I am so terrified of gaining back the weight. This is the part where I have to tell myself to keep using my surgery as a tool and not a solution. I will be able to eat more food, but it's up to me to make healthy choices. I literally have had nightmares about  gaining all of the weight back.

I am still committed to not eating sugar. I have tried a few things that have added sugar, and most of it does not bother me. However, I am making the voluntary commitment to stay away from it. I also try to avoid carbs. I don't eat pasta (but I crave it sometimes!), and I have massively cut back on bread.

I eat a lot of cheese and drink a lot of milk. I'm so glad that I love dairy and that it's a healthy part of my diet because of the protein.

I am still running bits at a time. Once school gets out, I plan on starting the C25K training. It is still exciting for me that I can run a whole block! It's difficult to run with Maggie though because she is so ADD. She will not be doing the C25K training for me. There are too many squirrels, kitties, and poop to smell in the world for her.

One month until I head to the Dominican Republic! I can't wait! And I have an entire new wardrobe to take with me!

One full week of school left... !

Success!

I can't believe another musical is over. I'm not completely sure what I will do with my life...

It was a huge success! The gym was packed for all three performances, and we got so many compliments. I'm going to have a hard time topping this one next year.

I finally passed the 70 pound mark! I am down 71 pounds total and 63 post-op. And, for the record, pulling 14 hour days is so much easier when you're 70 pounds lighter. I am still exhausted, but I don't feel the aches and pains that I felt last year.

Now I will be moving my concentration to getting ready for my spring concerts, doing auditions, graduation, and training for my 5K.

Maggie comes home to me on Wednesday! I have missed her so much.

26 school days left!

"Tale as old as time..."

It's musical week!

What a challenging show this has been, but it's finally starting to look like a show on stage. The costumes came in on Friday and they look amazing! I am so excited for the community to witness all of the hard work we have put into the show.

I haven't had any time to do any running in the past week, and I've been missing it. I won't have any time this coming week, either. I'll be thankful to have my evenings back once the show is over.

I hit the 69 pounds down mark this week. I feel fantastic, even though I am exhausted from the stress of the musical.

Just over 9 weeks until I head to the Dominican Republic. I want 19 more pounds gone!

31 more school days left. The musical, two concerts, and lots and lots of students to audition for next year's ensembles. Bring it on!

67 pounds down picture!

Sunday night ramblings

The start of another week. The last week of regular rehearsals. Next week we begin dress rehearsals. Aaahh! What was I smoking when I picked this show?! Life-sized teapots, transforming Beasts...

But it will all be amazing in the end, I know it.

So here are the stats: 67 pounds total and 59 post-op.

The amount of energy I have is, frankly, thrilling to me. I love that I'm not exhausted by being on my feet all day. I love that I can run up a flight of stairs. Hell, I'm loving that I can run an entire block! I can now run all the way from Fairground to Summer street in Hillsboro. It probably sounds stupid to most of you, but coming from 300+ pounds and not being able to run more than 10 feet, it's quite an accomplishment. I am also enjoying it, especially as the weather gets warmer. Maggie is loving it, too.

I think I'm starting to unravel all of my issues with my new physical perception.

Like I have said before, I have struggled with weight most of my life. After puberty, it became a very big issue. Naturally, this affected my self esteem. No one wanted to date me in high school, and I was sure it was because of my appearance. I still don't know why, but it doesn't matter now. I'm not here to dwell on the past.

Anyways, I would obsess about my appearance, trying to find something that was attractive. Do you ever notice that after you look at a word a lot, it starts to look really weird or distorted? I think that happened with me. I started to distort what I saw in the mirror and only saw what I wanted to see, which was, of course, someone much smaller. Then I would see pictures and be surprised at how I looked. My brain would choose to ignore that.

My current weight it where I think my mind was nearly 70 pounds ago. So now, what I see in the mirror is what my brain is actually seeing! So it's like nothing has changed.

Did any of that even make sense?

No? Okay. I think Beauty and the Beast has damaged my brain.

Ultimately, I did this to better my health and to live a longer, fuller life. However, I dare to hope that this weight loss may help me to be more attractive to someone... I know, I know, appearance shouldn't matter to someone who loves you, but let's be honest. It does. There has to be an element of physical attraction in a relationship.

I have about 2 more months to get to my goal before vacation in the Dominican Republic! 23 more pounds.

Hello, April!

I cannot believe that it's April already. We have 18 days until the show. Scary, but it's coming together piece by piece. I can't wait to see the finished product.

Maggie and I spent a few days with my mom over Easter break. It was nice to get out of Hillsboro for a few days and just forget about all of the stress at school.

The weight loss is still slowly going. As of today I am down 65 pounds total and 57 post-op.

Over the past few weeks I have been struggling with my physical perception of myself. For some reason, I see myself as being fatter than ever. I can see the weight loss sometimes, but not often. This has only been going on for a little while. It is really frustrating. I want to be proud of the weight I have lost, but my brain is not catching up.

In 3 weeks, I will have my life back! Hard to believe.

It's gonna be a fight to the finish.

I'm almost three months out since surgery, and I'm feeling nearly normal. I actually miss the days when I was full on 3 tablespoons. The weight sure came off a lot quicker then! With the natural healing of my stomach, things have begun to stretch out and my portions are larger, this the slowdown of weight loss. I'm also able to tolerate more foods, though I do not go near anything that has added sugar. Natural sugars are fine, but anything with added sugar makes me feel sick.

The real battle begins now. Can I continue to lose weight with my stomach stretching naturally? It will be harder, that's for sure. However, I am embarking on a new journey that will hopefully help me out.

With my nearly 60 pound weight loss, my energy level has increased. I have the desire to be active, which is really exciting for me! Since I am so horribly not coordinated, it's probably best that I stay away from all sports, for the sake of my reputation. So, I have decided to start training for a 5K. Yes, me. The girl who complained all through junior high when I had to run in PE. I have signed up for the Color Run in St. Louis on September 15th. I'm not going to start hardcore training until after musical is over in April just because of a lack of time, but I have been doing some running while Maggie and I take our walks. Just 30 seconds at a time. It's so exciting for me to be able to run at all! It has felt pretty good. Along with working on my house and vacation this summer, my other project will be running. I'm hoping this will keep my weight loss going.

I'm really thankful for this surgery. It has given me a second chance at life. My quality of life has improved, even with just 60 pounds of excess weight gone. I still have 80 pounds to go until goal weight, but that will likely take another year at least. Small steps.

This week begins hardcore rehearsals for the musical. The next 6 weeks of my life are the most stressful and busy out of the whole year. I hope I survive it!

The stats... 51 pounds since surgery, 59 total.

Most recent picture!

Only 2 pounds?!

Well, the stall has ended... sort of. I've lost 2 pounds as of Monday. It's better than nothing, but it's still frustrating! So, 47 pounds down since surgery and 55 total. 

However, I know that, regardless of what the scale says, I'm losing inches because my clothes are still seeming to get bigger. I'm still anxious for the scale to move more. I really want to lose another 30 pounds before I go to the Dominican Republic in June. 

I'm having the urge to starting running. I'm hoping that once it gets a little warmer, I can teach Maggie to run with me. I'm not really holding my breath, though. She is awful on the leash and does whatever she wants. I'd probably end up trampling her or she would try to bite my feet and pants, which is the norm.

Musical is in full force! 7 weeks until the performances. I feel more stressed out this year than I ever did last year. 

I don't feel like I have more energy, which I think I should after losing 55 pounds. Hmph. 

I am so anxious for summer. This school year has been tumultuous because of the budget cuts and all of the uncertainty. I can't wait to spend the summer having fun and working on my house. And I hope I'm at least 30 pounds lighter by the time summer gets here!

Back to normal

Let me start out by saying that antibiotics and I are in a fight. The antibiotic that my doctor put me on for the abscess made me so sick. I threw up almost every day of the 10 days I took it. It was a miserable 10 days.

The good news? I have been done with it for over a week now and I feel a million times better. I am back to eating normally (well, as normal as possible with a sleeve!) and I am feeling so much better. I hope that is the one and only hurdle from the surgery.

I am finding that I have to eat every 2 hours now. I feel completely awful if I don't eat. I feel like I'm eating all day long!

As of last week, I hit the 45 pound mark. So, I am 45 post op and 53 total. I lost quite a bit of weight while I was dealing with the abscess. When I finished the antibiotic and started eating more normally, my weight loss plateaued. Which is okay because the last 10 pounds came off too fast because I wasn't eating. I'm ready for it to start up again! I'll be coming up on my 2 month anniversary soon. The weight loss will really slow down after the 3 month mark, so I'm hoping to get off another 20 pounds before March 19th.

Clothing has been a struggle. None of my dress pants fit and I can't find any reasonably priced anywhere! I don't want to pay a ton of money for them because I'll likely be too small for them within a month or so.

Counting down the weeks until summer! I can't wait for all of the things I have planned for summertime.

So, it wasn't a stomach bug.

That whole thing last week where I thought I had a stomach bug? Wrong. Very wrong.

Friday, I felt sick and tried to rest. Same on Saturday. I called the doctor on call, and she said to wait it out for 24 hours and see if it might be a stomach bug. On Saturday night, my fever went up to 101.1. Along with the pain when swallowing and just pain in general, I thought it was time to go to the ER. Unfortunately, all of my symptoms coincided with a leak, which can be really serious. I had a fever, pain in my tummy, overall fatigue, and left shoulder pain. This had me really worried.

Mom came down and took me to Barnes. The ER wait was pretty long, but eventually I got in and got a cat scan. They were able to see a pocket of fluid indicating a leak or an abscess. By this time it was almost midnight. They put me in the hospital overnight to monitor me. On Monday morning, I went in for a barium swallow (always pleasant!) and the news was good: no leak! So it's either an abscess or a blood clot. The doctors thought they might drain it with a needle or put a surgical drain in, but they decided that it was too close to other organs and too much of a risk.

They wanted to monitor me another night. In my typical fashion, I kept the nurses running for barf pans and Zofran. I puked 3 times in the hospital. It may be just because I'm not eating anything or because the abscess is causing me pain. Who knows. They sent me home on Tuesday morning with an intense antibiotic, Zofran, and an anti-fungal. So I get to suck down 4 pills a day. Yippee!

The bad thing about all of this is that Thursday I went to Peoria for the All-State conference. I just got back home. Luckily, I was able to get some rest in the hotel. My body was just not up for walking around downtown Peoria for miles in the freezing ass cold. I did get to reunite with some Millikin-ites, which was nice.

I am feeling better. I threw up on the drive up to Peoria on Thursday, but have managed to stay barf-free since then. I have to keep drinking milk to keep protein in me, and that seems to keep the nausea away. The doctor put me back on an all liquids diet, which was a pain being in Peoria. I had milk with me everywhere. I did some soup, which went okay.

I go back to the doctor on Tuesday. Hopefully I'll get to go back to soft foods. Guess it all depends on how I am feeling.

The stats... 38 pounds post-op, 46 total!

And one month later...

Today is my one month "surgiversary!"

The stats: 30 pounds are gone since surgery. 38 pounds since my highest weight. Happy!

On Thursday evening, I started feeling like poo. On Friday morning, I felt more like poo. Today, I feel even more like poo. I think I have a stomach bug, but it has been worrying me a little. It's impossible to tell if this is something related to surgery or a bug. I called my doctor's office and they said to go on clear fluids and wait it out a few days. If it's still happening on Tuesday, I need to go see the doctor. Crossing my fingers this is just a bug. Lots of kids have been out with the whole stomach flu thing. But I can tell you it's pretty unpleasant on a tummy that had surgery 1 month ago. :(

Other than this, I have been feeling great! I am moving down in sizes. Soon it will be time for some new pants, which is exciting.

I would like to lose another 40 pounds before my vacation to the Dominican Republic in June. Goals!

Hmph.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't feeling a little discouraged right now.

I have only lost one pound in the last week. Now, the doctor told me that I will have scale victories and clothing victories. I am definitely seeing and feeling the weight loss in my clothing, which is exciting. But the weight loss has slowed down so much that it's frustrating.

I'm a member of a support group on facebook, and many of them have said that this is normal. But still!

I am, overall, feeling better. My back doesn't ache as much and neither do my feet. I have more energy.

Tomorrow I go to soft foods! Yay.

So, my official weight loss is 32 pounds and 24 post-op.

Sweet tooth, are you there?

The craziest part of all of this is that I don't really have a sweet tooth anymore. It's amazing and exactly the opposite of what I thought would happen. I crave savory foods - meats and veggies mostly.

I graduate to soft foods on Friday! Woo. I have been cheating a little and not eating totally pureed food the whole time. I eat a lot of the Laughing Cow light cheese - it's the perfect portion size for me.  I also do a ton of greek yogurt with truvia. Lots of eggs, too. Also, my peanut butter and jelly on a spoon creation - natural peanut butter and sugar-free preserves on a spoon.

The weight loss has slowed down, sadly enough. I am down 31 pounds total, 23 pounds post-op. But, I figure that is normal. I'm definitely taking in more calories than I did on the liquid diet. I'm hoping to lose two pounds a week consistently for a few months.

I'm feeling good still. I pushed myself a little too hard last week and got really tired, but I had the weekend to rest. School is going well. Beauty and the Beast rehearsals started today! So excited for this show!

I'm also planning my vacation this summer. Jen and I are hopefully going to the Dominican Republic to a resort for a week. It will be like a celebration for me and my weight loss journey.

Onward!

2 weeks out

The 2 week update:

I am astonished at how good I feel. I go back to school tomorrow and I feel ready. I'm ready to see my kids and get this semester started. I will be more tired than normal, that's for sure, but I am not having any sort of pain. Life is almost normal for me.

Officially I am 30 pounds down today. 22 post-op.

For anyone who thinks this is a quick fix to being obese and that it's no work... You are sorely mistaken. The mental work I have gone through over the past two weeks has been some of the hardest ever. It takes soul searching and almost a makeover on your whole persona. I am changing my outlook from living to eat to eating to live.

Right now I'm getting myself a pedicure in preparation for an insane semester at school! Happy new year!