I can't believe another musical is over. I'm not completely sure what I will do with my life...
It was a huge success! The gym was packed for all three performances, and we got so many compliments. I'm going to have a hard time topping this one next year.
I finally passed the 70 pound mark! I am down 71 pounds total and 63 post-op. And, for the record, pulling 14 hour days is so much easier when you're 70 pounds lighter. I am still exhausted, but I don't feel the aches and pains that I felt last year.
Now I will be moving my concentration to getting ready for my spring concerts, doing auditions, graduation, and training for my 5K.
Maggie comes home to me on Wednesday! I have missed her so much.
26 school days left!
Sunday, April 21, 2013
Sunday, April 14, 2013
"Tale as old as time..."
It's musical week!
What a challenging show this has been, but it's finally starting to look like a show on stage. The costumes came in on Friday and they look amazing! I am so excited for the community to witness all of the hard work we have put into the show.
I haven't had any time to do any running in the past week, and I've been missing it. I won't have any time this coming week, either. I'll be thankful to have my evenings back once the show is over.
I hit the 69 pounds down mark this week. I feel fantastic, even though I am exhausted from the stress of the musical.
Just over 9 weeks until I head to the Dominican Republic. I want 19 more pounds gone!
31 more school days left. The musical, two concerts, and lots and lots of students to audition for next year's ensembles. Bring it on!
What a challenging show this has been, but it's finally starting to look like a show on stage. The costumes came in on Friday and they look amazing! I am so excited for the community to witness all of the hard work we have put into the show.
I haven't had any time to do any running in the past week, and I've been missing it. I won't have any time this coming week, either. I'll be thankful to have my evenings back once the show is over.
I hit the 69 pounds down mark this week. I feel fantastic, even though I am exhausted from the stress of the musical.
Just over 9 weeks until I head to the Dominican Republic. I want 19 more pounds gone!
31 more school days left. The musical, two concerts, and lots and lots of students to audition for next year's ensembles. Bring it on!
Sunday, April 7, 2013
Sunday night ramblings
The start of another week. The last week of regular rehearsals. Next week we begin dress rehearsals. Aaahh! What was I smoking when I picked this show?! Life-sized teapots, transforming Beasts...
But it will all be amazing in the end, I know it.
So here are the stats: 67 pounds total and 59 post-op.
The amount of energy I have is, frankly, thrilling to me. I love that I'm not exhausted by being on my feet all day. I love that I can run up a flight of stairs. Hell, I'm loving that I can run an entire block! I can now run all the way from Fairground to Summer street in Hillsboro. It probably sounds stupid to most of you, but coming from 300+ pounds and not being able to run more than 10 feet, it's quite an accomplishment. I am also enjoying it, especially as the weather gets warmer. Maggie is loving it, too.
I think I'm starting to unravel all of my issues with my new physical perception.
Like I have said before, I have struggled with weight most of my life. After puberty, it became a very big issue. Naturally, this affected my self esteem. No one wanted to date me in high school, and I was sure it was because of my appearance. I still don't know why, but it doesn't matter now. I'm not here to dwell on the past.
Anyways, I would obsess about my appearance, trying to find something that was attractive. Do you ever notice that after you look at a word a lot, it starts to look really weird or distorted? I think that happened with me. I started to distort what I saw in the mirror and only saw what I wanted to see, which was, of course, someone much smaller. Then I would see pictures and be surprised at how I looked. My brain would choose to ignore that.
My current weight it where I think my mind was nearly 70 pounds ago. So now, what I see in the mirror is what my brain is actually seeing! So it's like nothing has changed.
Did any of that even make sense?
No? Okay. I think Beauty and the Beast has damaged my brain.
Ultimately, I did this to better my health and to live a longer, fuller life. However, I dare to hope that this weight loss may help me to be more attractive to someone... I know, I know, appearance shouldn't matter to someone who loves you, but let's be honest. It does. There has to be an element of physical attraction in a relationship.
I have about 2 more months to get to my goal before vacation in the Dominican Republic! 23 more pounds.
But it will all be amazing in the end, I know it.
So here are the stats: 67 pounds total and 59 post-op.
The amount of energy I have is, frankly, thrilling to me. I love that I'm not exhausted by being on my feet all day. I love that I can run up a flight of stairs. Hell, I'm loving that I can run an entire block! I can now run all the way from Fairground to Summer street in Hillsboro. It probably sounds stupid to most of you, but coming from 300+ pounds and not being able to run more than 10 feet, it's quite an accomplishment. I am also enjoying it, especially as the weather gets warmer. Maggie is loving it, too.
I think I'm starting to unravel all of my issues with my new physical perception.
Like I have said before, I have struggled with weight most of my life. After puberty, it became a very big issue. Naturally, this affected my self esteem. No one wanted to date me in high school, and I was sure it was because of my appearance. I still don't know why, but it doesn't matter now. I'm not here to dwell on the past.
Anyways, I would obsess about my appearance, trying to find something that was attractive. Do you ever notice that after you look at a word a lot, it starts to look really weird or distorted? I think that happened with me. I started to distort what I saw in the mirror and only saw what I wanted to see, which was, of course, someone much smaller. Then I would see pictures and be surprised at how I looked. My brain would choose to ignore that.
My current weight it where I think my mind was nearly 70 pounds ago. So now, what I see in the mirror is what my brain is actually seeing! So it's like nothing has changed.
Did any of that even make sense?
No? Okay. I think Beauty and the Beast has damaged my brain.
Ultimately, I did this to better my health and to live a longer, fuller life. However, I dare to hope that this weight loss may help me to be more attractive to someone... I know, I know, appearance shouldn't matter to someone who loves you, but let's be honest. It does. There has to be an element of physical attraction in a relationship.
I have about 2 more months to get to my goal before vacation in the Dominican Republic! 23 more pounds.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Hello, April!
I cannot believe that it's April already. We have 18 days until the show. Scary, but it's coming together piece by piece. I can't wait to see the finished product.
Maggie and I spent a few days with my mom over Easter break. It was nice to get out of Hillsboro for a few days and just forget about all of the stress at school.
The weight loss is still slowly going. As of today I am down 65 pounds total and 57 post-op.
Over the past few weeks I have been struggling with my physical perception of myself. For some reason, I see myself as being fatter than ever. I can see the weight loss sometimes, but not often. This has only been going on for a little while. It is really frustrating. I want to be proud of the weight I have lost, but my brain is not catching up.
In 3 weeks, I will have my life back! Hard to believe.
Maggie and I spent a few days with my mom over Easter break. It was nice to get out of Hillsboro for a few days and just forget about all of the stress at school.
The weight loss is still slowly going. As of today I am down 65 pounds total and 57 post-op.
Over the past few weeks I have been struggling with my physical perception of myself. For some reason, I see myself as being fatter than ever. I can see the weight loss sometimes, but not often. This has only been going on for a little while. It is really frustrating. I want to be proud of the weight I have lost, but my brain is not catching up.
In 3 weeks, I will have my life back! Hard to believe.
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